Thursday, September 28, 2006

Top 5 Cameos

"We're gonna make 'em eat our shit, then shit out our shit, then eat their shit which is made up of our shit that we made 'em eat"
Here are the finest five of them all.

5) Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back (2001)
Will Ferrell, Jason Lee, Judd Nelson, Carrie Fisher, Jon Stewart, Chris Rock, Mark Hamill and basically all the people who have worked with Kevin Smith in the past. Most of them are making a favour to a friend, but in the end you get the feeling it wasn't all just for the laughs. I mean, every cameo is totally irrelevant with each other, they exist just as an excuse to give the movie a fake A-list glory, where quantity overcomes quality. Understandable though, cause this movie is actually based on cameos, otherwise viewing would be impossible. There isn't a chance Jay and Silent Bob could pull it off on their own. But, overall, it's a cameo driven movie, so that's more than enough to earn the 5th place. Mindless fun.

4) The Blues Brothers (1980)
This one is really special. It's like a blues/cinema fan's wet dream. Henry Gibson, Twiggy, Frank Oz, Chaka Khan, John Candy, Steven Spielberg, director John Landis, Paul Reubens,Carrie Fisher, and of course Ray Charles and Aretha Franklin. All the cameos fit in, they dont's get tiring, they're sticking to the wacky mood of the film. They're elevating the movie's storyline, transforming it into something surreal.If there's a movie which can be called cult classic, then this is the one, and it's mainly due to its numerous cameos.

3) Zoolander (2001)
Where to start. David Bowie, Natalie Portman, Lenny Kravitz, Donald Trump, Christian Slater and dozens more. Half of America's showbusiness, basically. Though here, there is an actual story. The cameos are just for the laughs, plus they give the movie a more down-to earth tone. It's all out there to give you the feeling that Derek Zoolander is really out there. Threatening, isn't it? But they overdo it a bit, using every single celebrity they could get their hands on. Still, this is a cameo marathon, where you lose count after a while. And it's, if not the birth of the Frat Pack, it 's definitely the foundations. Keep an eye for Andy Dick as Olga the Masseuse!

2) Austin Powers In GoldMember (2002)
Amazing opening sequence. Tom Cruise, Gwyneth Paltrow, Kevin Spacey and Danny DeVito, Spielberg, it's Hollywood's creme de la creme. And the whole sequence fits perfectly in the whole movie's attitude. You get that silly grin/smile seeing them, exactly like in all the Austin Powers Movies. And then it's the Osbournes, Travolta, Spears, Rob Lowe... Smashing baby, yeah.It actually shows right up from the beginning, it's going to be the best of all three.

1) Alfred Hitchcock in most of his movies
This is actually an exception. This is a whole filmography of cameos. 35 of them. It's not like "appearing in his movies" is his thing. That's just with the blond chicks. We're talking about the king of suspense. When you're watching a Hitchcock movie, you get sucked up by the storyline, the atmosphere, you await the big twist, and of course you keep an eye for the blink-and-you'll-miss-it cameo. They're all carefully premeditated trademarks. So, the cameos actually serve a higher purpose, which doesn't really contribute anything to the story, but adds up to the whole experience.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

The Top 5 of the Frat Pack

"Death, you are my bitch lover"
Here are the finest five of them all.

5) Owen Wilson
Best known for his low-key performance and his improvisational skills, he probably has the biggest box-office hits of them all. He tried other stuff in the past, like Behind Enemy Lines and the remake of The Haunting, but it was quite obvious where he would end up. He 's Wes Anderson's right hand, and he's definitely a very talented script writer. Even so, I can't really understand why he's considered such a great comedian. All his roles are basically the same guy, except for the Anderson films. Always this nice guy with surfer hair and whispering his lines. You might say he's got chemistry with every guy he plays along with, but that goes for the whole Frat Pack. Zoolander, the Wedding Crashers, Starsky and Hutch,Meet the Parents, the Jackie Chan movies... It's as if he is handed a script and puts on the auto pilot. Luke Wilson would definitely be in his place, if only he had a few more hits. Anyway, it's sure that his success is based upon the rest of them, and I would like to see him hold his own for once.

4) Vince Vaugn
The same goes for Vince. He's just this huge fellow, saying his lines in light speed and giving a spoiled attitude in all his characters. The only movie he's really thrived in is Swingers. Then it's downhill until he meets the rest of the gang. Seriously mate, Norman Bates? The Cell? And then he hits it big with Old School and Dodgeball, and then he goes huge with Wedding Crashers. I can't say, most of them are hilarious, but definitely not thanks to his lame persona. At least he has proven his skills in the past, like the white-man-talking-black in Be Cool. Steve Carell would be in No 4, but he's got only one leading role, and that's in a non Frat Pack movie. I guess Vince's talentless personality will be exposed in time, but I understand why he's made it so far. It's sheer luck and nothing else, no wonder why he's sleeping with Jennifer.

3) Jack Black
Jack 's a comedian, no doubt about it. He's got all the qualities, a chubby figure, wacky attitude, trademark lines, stupid face, adjustable voice. Plus he's in the greatest band in the worldTM. His comedic genious was obvious from High Fidelity, a real scene-stealer. Although he hasn't got that many participations in Frat Pack movies, he is mainly connected with Ben Stiller. He's starred in a couple of less known and early frat pack movies, like Heat Vision and Jack, the Cable Guy and Orange County. And yes, Envy.Oh God, Envy. If only there was a spray for this piece of shit to dissapear. Anyway, he knows how to "ride the thunder", and he finally gets the comedic praise he deserves, with Nacho Libre and the highly anticipated Tenacious D in The Pick Of Destiny. He definitely earned the third place.

2) Ben Stiller
He is the link between all the Frat Pack members. He's not exactly versatile as an actor, but he has made more differentiated leading roles than any of the others. Moronic supermodel Derek Zoolander, goofy son-in-law Gaylord Focker or Reality Bites' dyslexic Michael Grates, he can write and direct just as well. He gets extra credit for his SNL presence. But his greatest role too is in a non frat pack movie. There's Something About Mary, the movie that actually established him in Hollywood, wouldn't be the same without him. He's currently America's funny man, the go-to guy if you want to make it big. And look where Owen Wilson and Vince Vaugn are now...

1) Will Ferrell
He's the greatest scene stealer there is. With not so many leading roles in his CV, who can forget his role in Wedding Crashers, or the belly-button lover in Starsky And Hutch, or the "Springtime for Hitler" Nazi writer in The Producers. Plus, he's got ace leading and supporting roles, be it Frank the Tank, the "Derelicte" designer Mugatu, or Ron Burgundy. He tried more serious comedy roles, but he didn't quite fit in, like Melinda And Melinda. His comedic genious was revealed in the world mainly with Elf and Talladega Nights, but he paved his road to stardom exclusively with Saturday Night Live. Two words, Alex Trebek. Plus, in every single interview, appearance or statement, he confirms his comedy qualities. He recently appeared in Megan Mullally's show wearing just briefs. He's the belly laughs in the Frat Pack movies, the real reason why their films are so successfull. Jim Carrey, make room, here come's Will.

The Frat Pack is the unofficial name for a group of actors who have appeared in numerous films together. These appearances are often in supporting or cameo roles, and the films share an absurdist sense of humor.The generally acknowledged members of the Frat Pack are Ben Stiller, Vince Vaughn, Will Ferrell, Owen and Luke Wilson, Jack Black, and Steve Carell.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Top 5 Action Stars of all-time

"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die... "
Here are the finest five of them all.

5) Sylvester Stallone

Crooked mouth, bad accent, huge biceps and 30 Razzie nominations, what's not to love about Sly. Although Rocky may still be his finest performance, if not movie, he'll be mostly remembered for Rambo, the archetype of most action heroes in the 80s and mid 90s. He tried writing and directing but always came back to what he did best. Judge Dredd, Demolition Man, Daylight, as he gets older he gets softer. And then he goes method and gives us Copland. Now, at the "tender" age of 60, he attempts a big comeback with Rocky Balboa out in a few months and Rambo IV in the making. Can he pull it out this time? Only time will tell, but it seems the odds are on his favour.

4) Harrison Ford
Just think of what this guy has achieved over the years. He goes huge with Star Wars, then plays the best action hero ever. Indy ain't macho, Han don't have a six-pack, but it's Harrisson's smooth style and on-screen wit that gives his characters top action hero qualities. Extra points for performance too, with Blade Runner giving us the chills, Jack Ryan giving us the thrills and Dr Kimble showing us how much he has matured over the years. Still, in his late 50s he could hung from the back of Air Force 1 ( Hail to CGI!), and even reach Anne Heche's feminine side. Can't wait for Indy 4.

3) Tom Cruise
Come on, admit it, this man's carreer is nearly flawless, Paedophilia-Scientology-Oprah's sofa aside. Be it an epic Samurai movie, a cold blooded hitman or a crackhead truth seeking future cop, he's ace in all of them. Oh, that and three jaw-dropping M:Is. Plus, he does all his own stunts just for kicks.He's the absolute action hero of the last decade. And he has worked with Coppola, Scorcese, Altman, De Palma, Mann, Spielberg, Kubrick. Fuck man, I'm jealous.

2) Arnold Schwarzenegger.
He's Conan the Barbarian. He's the Terminator. He's the Governor of California. Seems like Hollywood always had a thing for lousy accents and big muscles. Still, he's the first action hero we all worshipped as kids. He can do it the hard way (Predator), he can do it the cool way (True Lies). This man is born for action movies and he knows it. He 's fought terrorists, mutants, Batman, himself, the Devil. Although his choices are mainly cash driven, he finds a way to pull it off.Except for Batman & Robin. And Junior. And Jingle All The Way. And Kindergarden Cop. You get the point. Even so, nobody deserves $30 million for a single movie, if not Arnie.

1) Bruce Willis
That's right, he's the greatest action star of all-time. He may not have abs, huge biceps or monstrous box office hits. He may not do his own stunts. He may even be typecasted as hell for the last decade. But you should agree that when you see him holding a gun, it fits,man. Thank God Stallone didn't get the part of John McLane. Bruce 's got bad-ass attitude, knows how to deliver a line and is as cool as a Tarantino quote. Who could possibly be more cynical in Last Boy Scout? Bruce's characters show Mel Gibson how officer Riggs should really be like. His performances are trully respectable, be it Sin City, Pulp Fiction or 12 Monkeys. He can act, there's no doubt about it. His collaborations with Shyamalan removed the action hero tag from his forehead, but he couldn't help it but return to what he knows best, going Method-man in 16 Blocks and attempting to reach new territories with Lucky Number Slevin. He's the action hero next door, and that's what makes him so great. Still, the truth be told, his throne is at stake. With Die Hard 4.0 filming as we speak, he could establish his throne as action king, or pass the sceptre. We hope it's the first...

Contenders: The Rock, Jason Statham and Vin Diesel have just a couple of actioners to date, Dolph Lundgren and Wesley Snipes have too many flops, Gibson is too lame and Eastwood is too old. Steve McQueen could be in, and I actually considered Thomas Jane for a second there...